


Three Words

by Kattwyllie



Category: Law & Order: SVU
Genre: Angst, Explicit Language, F/F, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Friends With Benefits, Lesbian Sex, Pining, Sex, Smut, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-26
Updated: 2021-01-22
Packaged: 2021-03-06 22:06:52
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 11
Words: 19,252
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26126215
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kattwyllie/pseuds/Kattwyllie
Summary: Casey Novak & You have known each other since college, her pre-Harvard days. She's in New York for Christmas break and she needs you, more now than ever.
Relationships: Casey Novak & You, Casey Novak/Reader
Comments: 6
Kudos: 17





	1. Chapter 1

_‘I need you.’_

Three words, those three little words in a text was all it took. You quickly responded, asking where, tugging your coat against you as the cold winter air whipped around you through the streets of New York. Luckily the bar wasn’t far from your apartment, she was at the NoMad hotel’s bar. She of course, being none other than Casey Novak. 

You’d gone to college together, quickly bonding and becoming very close friends, you spent probably too much time together as you worked through the relentless hours of studying and school projects. She’d always held a special place in your heart, while at first you thought it was just friendship, it was in your final year of college you started to realize it was more, when she started dating someone, you knew you were sad beyond more than just losing out on friendship hours, but you soldiered through. You could push the school girl crush to the side, you were happy as long as she was happy. Not that it really mattered since she was headed to Cambridge for another three years of law school while you were set to start career hunting in New York. When she’d originally texted you, you didn’t even realize she was home for Christmas break, figuring you’d be sorting things out over the phone or FaceTime, surprised when she gave you the name of the bar. 

You gave a soft smile to the hotel doorman opening the door to you, heading right into the attached lounge, pausing for a moment before you spotted her sitting near the corner of the bar. You felt your heartbeat trying to chase after itself in your chest, it’d been two and a half years where you’d briefly managed to meet up over summer vacations, social media and texting being your main communication. Approaching the bar, you shucked your coat, placing it over the back of the bar chair as she looked up, you could see her eyes were red, she wasn’t kidding, something was definitely bothering her.

“Hey.” You greeted softly, a hand on her arm,

“Hey…” Her voice was solemn, she barely met your eyes, focussed more on the scotch in front of her.

“Case..You okay?” She merely gave you a shake of the head as a response. Still standing you pulled her into a hug, arms wrapping around her tightly, letting her accept the affection as long as she needed. When she let out a light sigh you gently pulled away, ordering a drink while you settled in the chair beside her. “You wanna talk about it?” She finally met your gaze, 

“Nicole broke up with me…over fucking text.” Casey shot back the rest of her drink at the admission. Nicole was the girl she’d started dating right before you graduated, a three year relationship, destroyed over a fucking text, yeah, you could imagine the pain she was in.

“Fuck, Case, I’m so sorry…” You gave her hand a squeeze, “Anyone would be a complete moron to let you go.”

“Thanks…” Her voice was layered with pain.

“Did…did she say why?” She let out a heavy sigh, signalling to the bartender for another round.

“About a month ago I said I wanted to move back here after we graduated. Now she tells me she wants to go to Chicago, no ifs ands or buts, said there was no way she was going to deal with long distance.” You let out a huff, 

“Well..she’s a bitch, doesn’t deserve you anyways.” You quickly added on a round of shots to your tab, pushing one to Casey before throwing them back.

“Thanks Y/N..really.” She shot you a soft smile, “And..thanks for coming..I..really didn’t know who else to call.”

“Hey…I’ll always be here for you, you know that.” Her eyes softened at the smile you gave her, knowing you weren’t kidding, you’d always been her go to in college, and that hadn’t changed. She gave a groan of a huff,

“Anyway. Enough about my disastrous love life, how’re you? The big city still treating you right?”

“Uh..yeah..” You shot a timid smile, not wanting to brag about your life while she thought hers was in shambles, “I’m working with the medical examiner’s office, just got promoted…”

“Shut up, that’s amazing!” You nearly flushed at the praise, 

“Thanks.”

“I’m serious! What’re you doing?”

“Managed to snag the position as the assistant to the medical examiner, she works mainly with sex crimes and homicide. I mean, I won’t lie, most of my job is running paperwork and lab results between her, the crime lab and the detectives, but it’s still what I wanted to do. Closest I could get without 15 years of schooling.”

“Is she a good boss at least?”

“I mean..she’ll send me to crime scenes when it’s below 40 degrees, but I won’t complain about the cold if I get to do more work. Hell I’ve learnt more from her than I did in school, Melinda’s amazing.”

“Good.” She gave you her first real smile of the night, “I’m proud of you, really.” 

“Give it a couple years Case, you’ll be winning every single case you take to trial, I know it.” A soft smirk shot across to her that she accepted. 

The two of you fell into an easy rhythm of conversation, reminiscing about the old days, talking over the stories of the last couple of years that you may have missed previously. Basically anything to avoid the topic of Nicole. You were both relaxed, at ease with each other, the friendship from the past nearly seven years flowing easily. You were happy when Casey laughed heartily for the first time at something you said, knowing she was fully distracted from her pain. The drinks flowed freely, but not to a point where either of you were past a bit tipsy, you’d ordered some snacking type appetizers, munching on them while you reconnected, a spark of familiarity flowing between you. It was nearly last call when you realized how late it was, your phone giving off the ‘its time for bed’ notification, sighing you hopped off the bar chair, tossing down cash for the food and drinks.

“I should probably go.” Your voice was hushed, eyes down as you shoved your wallet back into your bag, you barely felt Casey’s gentle hand on your cheek, fingers trailing down to your chin, turning your face to hers, a light in her eyes you’d never had the blessing to see yourself before.

“Or…don’t…” You could barely believe it when her soft lips met yours, practically melting against the feeling, your eyes fluttered shut, a hand finding its place at the back of her neck while the other gripped her thigh. Her free arm wrapped around your waist, pulling you closer to her, tongue trailing across your lower lip. You were quick to submit to her, letting her tongue delve into your mouth, tasting the mint of your mojito’s, tongue dancing around yours. You gripped her thigh tighter when her teeth nipped at your lower lip, tugging it from you before letting it snap back to you. The kiss was more than you could ever had imagined, all of your senses enlightened, like you were on goddamn cloud nine from simply a kiss. Fuck.

“Casey…” Your breath was hot against her face, lips barely detached from hers.

“Please.” The begging look in her eyes was all it took, you muttered something about living a few blocks away while she tossed down cash to cover her share of the bill before you were practically dragging her out of the bar. 

The moment you’d locked your apartment door behind you she was on you, lips feverishly moving against yours, begging for an actual connection she hadn’t felt in months, hands digging into your hair. You felt yourself rutting against her, cupping at the cheeks of her ass, hands dragging beneath her shirt as you backed into your bedroom. Lips barely leaving each other you managed to undress each other until you were bare, Casey’s mouth, dropped from yours, teeth nibbling down your neck, biting at your pulse point, hands groping at your tits, smirking at the moan that left your mouth. 

You were quick to softly shove her down onto your bed, lips greedily meeting hers again, moaning at the taste of her that you simply couldn’t get enough of. Your hips rutted against hers, begging for more friction, having imagined this moment for years, a breathy gasp leaving your lips at the feel of your clit rubbing against hers. With a grin on her lips, Casey sat up, wrapping a leg around you, leading one of yours around her so you were perfectly matched, hips rolling against each other perfectly. You found your head thrown back in pleasure as the rolling of your hips pressed your clits together, the friction making you thrive against her. Casey’s hand found it’s way to your chest, tweaking and playing with your tits, causing a hefty moan releasing from your mouth. Despite the awkward angle you continued to rut against her, hand pulling her into a frenzied kiss, tongues battling against each other, groaning into each other’s mouths. You could barely believe how quickly you came, shivering and whimpering against her body, the simple stimulation against your clit more than enough to make you weak.

You didn’t miss the glint in her eye as you practically collapsed against her, kissing her supple skin, knowing she’d reached her first peak too. You gave her a burning kiss, nipping at her lip before you mouth left a trail of kisses down her body, practically moaning at the sight of her soaked cunt when you settled between her legs. You didn’t give her any recovery, burying your face against her, lips pulling her lower ones into your mouth, resulting in a loud groan from her. You slowly and determinedly fucked her with your mouth, groaning at her absolute sweetness, relishing in the feeling of her hand grasping your hair. You plunged your tongue into her pussy, lapping at the escaping juices, nearly amazed at how fucking sweet she tasted, eyes closed, mouth humming against her cunt. Your lips moved up, sucking her clit into your mouth, fingers plunging into her heat as she let out a loud moan of your name, hips thrusting off the bed. You nearly chuckled against her thigh, nipping at it before you continued your assault on her clit. It only took a matter of minutes, you were too skilled, she was too touch starved, she came fucking hard around your fingers. Gently, you pulled your fingers out, kissing your way up her body, settling beside her, an arm wrapped around her as you softly traced her bare, panting skin. A few moments passed until she seemed to come back to earth.

“You okay?” You murmured, giving her shoulder a kiss.

“Yeah.” She let out a breath, not meeting your eye, slowly sitting up, grasping her phone off the bedside table, “I’ve got to go….family brunch tomorrow.”

“Oh..okay…”

“I’ll..see ya soon though…thank you.” Casey gave you a cheeky smile, collecting her clothes before making her way out of your apartment. You collapsed on the bed, feeling like a goddamn idiot, of course she had to go back to Harvard. If her last relationship got fucked up by long distance there was no way she was going to start one with you right now while you were state’s away. 

**

But that….that was three years ago.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, I'm taking major timeline liberties with this because well...I can. Lol. The squad is based season 17, with Liv as captain. But Alex has just been "killed", Casey's taking over ADA, Olivia's the only one that knows Alex is actually alive and in WPP. Just...to clarify.

You gave a warm wave to Nick and Sonny as you crossed through the bull pen, file folder in hand, Melinda had asked you to drop off reports for Captain Benson on your way home. The door was open so you only gave the briefest of knocks on the frame as you entered.

“Oh _come on_ Counsellor!” Olivia’s voice rung through the room, clearly angry you could tell from the tone in her voice she was simply not wanting to accept a new ADA. “We’ve given you everything we have on Richards, get us a warrant!”

“I can’t do that with circumstantial evidence, you should know that.”

“Shit, sorry.” You swerved, “I didn’t mean to interrupt.” You face scrunched quickly, breaking into a smile, “Hey.” You hadn’t realized Casey was the replacement for SVU. You’d been in touch, occasionally meeting up for drinks or lunch briefly, but you’d both been more than busy with work over the last few months.

“It’s fine Parker. Please tell me you’ve got good news on the Richards case.”

“Fraid I don’t.” You handed her the file, “She’s right, it’s circumstantial at best, DNA wasn’t a match.”

“Well what about the fingerprints? They were all over her office.” She was really grasping at straws here, the anger still very present in her voice, annoyed at the lawyer.

“Circumstantial, he was a client of hers, he was in that office nearly once a week.” Casey spoke calmly as to not egg her on even further. Benson began to nearly berate the younger woman, complaining about how she didn’t know what she was doing, too new and inexperienced in the world of sex crimes when you cut in.

“Liv! Take a second to chill, would you?” She froze, glancing over to you, perplexity written across her face, “You can’t chastise her for doing her job just because she’s not Alex.”

“Don’t you think you’re a little _out of line_?” She shot back.

“I’m just calling it how it is. You’re not the only one that misses her, trust me.” You understood where the emotion was coming from, but she had no reason to come after Alex’s replacement like that, whether or not it was Casey. Melinda had warned you about how Olivia had gotten after her partner was basically forced into retirement, how she’d constantly criticize Amaro over nit picky things, simply because he wasn’t Elliot. Truthfully, this was worse, having one of your closest friends shot in front of you wasn’t exactly an easy trauma to process. “You’ll have to keep digging, talk to her coworkers again, see if any of them will freely give up medical records, your perp had a vasectomy.”

“How do you know that?”

“The fluids present in the rape kit were semen, not sperm.”

“Fine.” Olivia groaned out, running a hand through her hair, turning her back to the two of you with a small wave of her hand as a signal that she was done with you.

“Thanks.” Casey shot you a warm smile as the elevator doors slid shut.

“No worries.” You smiled back, “Everyone’s a little on edge right now.”

“Understandably.” 

“How’d they manage to convince you into this after white collar?”

“I asked for straight homicide, but this was the opening they had for me.” Glancing down to her watch quickly, she took in the fact that you weren’t in your work scrubs. “You got time for a drink? Get me up to speed on the squad.” She shot you a sly grin.

“Course.”

**

Twenty minutes later you and Casey were nestled into bar stools in the lounge side of Latitude, a glass of rose in front of you, her usual scotch set in front of her as you picked over some cauliflower wings and truffle fries. You’d caught up on the walk over, effortless conversation flowing between you, full of laughter and smiles, happy to actually get to enjoy some time together for once.

“So aside from being a little high strung right now, what do I need to watch out for with these guys?” Casey’s lips spread into a smirk, she knew if there was someone to have the workplace drama/gossip it would definitely be you. Something about working around dead bodies all day made you pay a little extra attention, having to gain entertainment from something. Not to mention you were used to working with the squad as an outside force, much like she would be.

“God…where to even start?” You hummed over a sip of wine, “Liv’s honestly not that bad, Alex was one of her like, only friends, she’s not exactly taking it well. Otherwise she’s got a good head on her shoulders, does her best to keep the squad under control, really good with the vic’s, spends a lot of time advocating for them. She’ll be pretty strong willed to make sure you’re doing everything you can to get them justice on the cases.”

“Noted.” Casey’s eyes shot down to her phone as the screen lit up, eyes scanning the message quickly, “She definitely seemed passionate today.”

“I’d keep an eye on how you conduct yourself around the Sarge. Honestly great guy, heart’s in the right place but the squad’s been nothing but unwelcoming since he showed up.”

“Why?”

“Mike Dodds.”

“As in the police chief’s son?”

“Exactly.” You popped a fry into your mouth, “They’re all freaked out that he’s a fucking snitch, ready to run off to Daddy anytime he witness anything that’s even the slightest toe over the line…which is a lot…”

“Oh great.” Casey rolled her eyes, 

“Yeah. Good luck with that.” You laughed, glad that your end of the job didn’t have to worry too much about whether the detectives broke a rule or two along the way.

“Is he a snitch?” She asked in reference to Mike.

“No! He’s super chill, really sweet guy who just can’t seem to catch a break with this crowd.”

“Sounds like someone has a little work crush.” You snorted into your wine at the thought,

“Yeah…right! He’s too…proper. And then I’d have to go to all those stuffy fucking galas, no thanks. I’ll stick to my dead people.” Casey laughed at that, knowing how much you hated glitzy parties, hell you’d nearly skipped your own graduation. 

“Okay so who’re the hot messes then?” The look you gave her in response was one that she instantly knew she’d be more than bickering with the next names.

“Amaro and Rollins are honestly fucking disasters. Like, I’m talking personal life and half the time at work…and dragging personal lives into work. Wow.” You drained your wine at the thought, asking for a refill as you continued, “Rollins was great when she first got here, she was more timid, worked really well but her and Nick just constantly edge each other on. She’s the one you’ll have the most to worry about going rogue undercover without permission or even mentioning it to anyone. Nearly got herself assaulted twice, not to mention the gambling problem. She’s got some weird thing going on with Carisi, none of us are really sure what it is. I don’t even think they really know.” You let out a huff of a laugh.

“And Nick?”

“I’d go over his jacket for sure if I were you. He gets super fired up over situations, there’s bound to be a few excessive force complaints in there. His divorce was nasty, wife showed up at the precinct more than a few times, huge arguments in front of everyone until Benson could rally them into a conference room.”

“Okay so who do I have that’s going to actually help my job?” She asked with a groan,

“Carisi!” You enunciated your enthusiasm with a point of a french fry, “That kid is a fucking gem of an angel. And he’s in night school at Fordham, bonus there. And Fin is easily the most unproblematic of all of them, good guy, been at SVU nearly as long as Liv has and does good work.”

“All very good things to know.” She gave you a soft smile that you returned, “You still enjoying working at the lab?”

“Yeah. It’s perfect. Hours can get a bit intense but anything in this line of business does.”

“You still don’t find it weird you spend most of your time with dead bodies?” 

“No.” You laughed over the rim of your wine glass, “I mean when it’s late and you’ve been at it for hours your mind definitely starts playing tricks on you, you start to think you saw a hand or foot move, but I’m usually not alone in the morgue.” Casey’s eyes fluttered to her phone once again, she’d seemed kind of distracted by the blinking device, but you knew what the job was like, “Work?” You questioned.

“No…” She shook her head, eyes glancing up right as your own phone went off. You huffed, annoyed at the interruption.

“Mine is…” You pulled out cash to cover your share while Casey flagged down the bartender.

“Perfect timing.” She replied, you noticed the bright smile on her face, eyes focussed behind you. You turned in time to see a woman greet Casey with a dazzling grin and a kiss on the cheek. “Y/N, this is Tara.”

“Oh..Hi..” You shook her hand gently, not missing the way Casey’s arm had wound around her waist. “I’ve gotta…” You gestured to your phone before answering it, giving Casey and Tara a wave as you grabbed your bag.

“Hey! Thanks for helping me kill time!” Casey called, you gave her a tight smile and a head nod before turning your full attention to what Melinda was saying to you.


	3. Chapter 3

You’d been working for a few hours almost wordlessly alongside Melinda, simply jotting down notes, finishing up paperwork and filing things into evidence bags while she went over a body for homicide. She slid the body into the cold locker, stripping off her gloves she tossed them in the garbage, stopping in front of the desk you were working at.

“You okay kid?” 

“Hmm?” You tore your eyes away from the file in front of you, looking up at her with confusion splayed on your face.

“You’re almost as quiet as Jane Doe over there.” She gestured to the cooler, “What’s going on?”

“I..” You sighed, “It’s nothing…don’t worry about it.” You turned back to your work, but Melinda wasn’t going to let up that easy.

“I take it you ran into the new A.D.A. when you dropped off that case file?” She quirked a brow, taking a seat on the edge of the desk. Of course she’d figure it out that quickly.

“Yeah…” You met her gaze, “Which is fine! We’re friends, have been for years, it’ll be nice to have her around more often.”

“But..?”

“There is no but.” You shot back, feeling the tightness rising in your chest.

“Honey there’s always a but when you’ve been in love with someone for five years.” Sputtering around the worst fake laugh you’d ever been able to produce in order to hide the embarrassment of your emotions you replied,

“I..am not in _love_ with her!” Melinda simply raised a brow, the all to familiar all knowing expression on her face. A heavy sigh escaped from your lips, “Okay, okay…I have…feelings for her.” 

“And the one time she finally let you in, she walked away just as fast.” She already knew the answer to that one, you’d had that discussion years ago. When, much like today, she could sense that you simply weren’t yourself when you came into work the following day. Something about being the only other living person in a room of dead bodies, you guessed it made you easier to read. God had you thought about that night for months, it still haunted your memories on empty nights when you couldn’t sleep, the kiss still burning against your lips all these years later. 

“Yeah…I mean..it’s fine. We went out for drinks, caught up, I filled her in on the squad, it was just like old times…” You trailed off, not wanting to mention the whole Tara incident. As if the whole school girl crush wasn’t embarrassing enough. 

“Ever occur to you that maybe she just doesn’t want to get hurt again?” You couldn’t help but scoff at that.

“I don’t think that’s the issue.” You closed the folder, tossing into the outbox on the desk, leaning back in the chair, “Turns out our drinks were only her way of killing time before dinner with her girlfriend…or date..whatever.”

“Just ask her about it next time you see her.” Melinda laughed at the horrified look you gave her, “You said it yourself, you’re friends, friends check up on things like that.” 

“But—“

“Does she even know you have feelings for her?”

“Well I thought that the whole _having sex_ thing revealed that.”

“And then it was a year before you saw her again, she probably figured you moved on, or that it was just a sex thing.”

“I mean, we never talked about it.”

“God kid, c’mon.” Melinda stood, swatting at your shoulder, motioning for you to stand. “We’ve gotta get you outta the morgue for a while, all these dead bodies have you forgetting that _communication_ is key when it comes to dealing with live humans.”

“I don’t wanna fuck up the friendship.”

“Don’t worry, I’ll explain how to talk to a pretty girl over drinks, it’s not as hard as you would think Parker.” You playfully shoved at her, laughing as you made your way back to the change room to get out of your scrubs before heading to the bar.

**

And it was just like that, Melinda coaxed a few more things out of you after a few more glasses of wine, when things began to flow more easily. You’d always gotten along with her, it wasn’t irregular to grab a bite after a long day in the morgue or coffees on the way home from a crime scene. True to her word she did keep you out of the morgue for the next week, letting you clear your head a bit while you worked with O’Halloran at the crime lab. Though that meant a lot more of running back and fourth to the precinct with case files and lab results, not that you minded, the city was warming up, the walks were a peaceful way for you to try to unscramble all the wires in your brain before word vomiting your way through a conversation. 

More than once you crossed paths with Casey, an always bright smile on her face when she saw you, often leaving the precinct at the same time, a laughter of conversation between you. Eventually you asked about Tara, you could feel Casey tense up a bit, she admitted that things weren’t exactly great at the moment, they’d been together a few months but Tara was complaining about Casey’s workload. Now that she’d been with SVU for a while, she was certainly spending more time in the courtroom and presumably way too much time in the office. 

It was two weeks later, after a particular brutal loss that you weren’t surprised to find her at the bar in the Soho Grand’s lounge. You’d turned down Amaro’s invite to join the squad for drinks at Forlini’s, knowing Casey had her heart in this case and was probably downtrodden and blaming the loss on herself, feeling like she’d let down the victim.

“Wasn’t your fault..” You greeted quietly, leaning against the bar beside her. She glanced up at you, giving you a weak excuse of a smile.

“People keep telling me that.” She took a swig of scotch, “Find it strange considering it’s kind of my job to win.”

“Yeah, and it’s the defence attorney’s job to win for their client. Buchanan’s a pig, he plays dirty, it’s the only way he can win.”

“Well I can’t seem to catch a break when it comes to losing nowadays.” You scrunched your brows, watching as she sank back the rest of her drink before meeting your eyes, “Tara called it quits ‘bout two weeks ago.”

“I’m sorry Case.” You gave her shoulder a squeeze, “C’mon, let’s get out of here.” It was her turn to air confusion as she took in the smirk on your face.

“What’re—“ You waved the bartender off, asking for the bill instead.

“What we’re _not_ going to do is try to drown our sorrows at the bottom of a liquor bottle. What we _are_ going to do, is hit shit with bats until you don’t feel upset anymore. Much better way to blow off steam than having to deal with a raging hangover while you plow through paperwork tomorrow.” She gave you a soft smile, the spark in her eye returned to its rightful place, “Hope you’ve still got a locker there, those heels don’t look like much fun.” That caused her to actually laugh, 

“You know, I don’t know what I’d do without you.” Casey gave you a genuine smile, linking her arm in yours as you made your way out of the lounge. It may not have been much, but that day was the start of something. 

Your friendship began to slowly evolve, you may have both grown, matured and changed over the years but it was back to the comfortability that it was back in college. You started spending more time together as more than just coworkers, indulging in movie nights or t.v. binging marathons, it became tradition for you to join her at the batting cage after a particularly rough day or case, simply keeping each other sane.


	4. Chapter 4

It was after a particular rough case that everyone felt the sting of, you’d ended up tossing a few too many shots of espresso vodka back at the bar in an attempt to unwind. You wouldn’t say anyone was drunk, just tipsy, trying to chase away the pain of the not guilty verdict, you were one of the first to throw in the towel, bidding the team goodnight. Casey mentioned something about you both going in the same direction and settled up as well. You fell into your usual banter in the city blocks surrounding the bar, smiles on your lips despite the downtrodden feeling of the evening, you couldn’t help the spark in your eye as you glanced over to her, nearly reaching your apartment building. You gave her a soft thank you for the walk home, she gave you one in return for helping her attempt to erase the trial results from her brain. It was only when you moved into your normal goodbye hug that you felt the air shift, her hand trailing from behind your head, fingers cupping against your chin.

“Case….” Your breath hitched, blown pupils meeting hers, you practically whimpered as her lips met yours, moving with care and ease. You tugged her against you, not wanting an inch of air to exist between you, arms wrapping tightly around her body, breath gasping against her mouth. Her tongue dove into your mouth, groaning against the taste of you, a taste she’d been craving for what seemed like years, a flavour that tasted so much like home she didn’t even realize. Your tongues danced against each other, savouring the taste of the other woman, bodies enflamed with passion. When you finally emerged from the kiss, gasping for air, you searched her face for any uncertainty. “I…uh..” Your voice was whisper of air against the New York night, “Do you…” She cut you off with a soft giggle, pulling you into another kiss, this one more brief but just as intimate.

“I’d love to.” Casey pecked your cheek before the two of you nearly ran into the building. 

You’d managed to lock your apartment door, both kicking off your shoes, jackets finding their place in the closet, a warm smile on Casey’s face when she pulled you into a heartwarming kiss. Lips gliding against each other so easily it felt like that’s truly where they belonged, humming in satisfaction at the feeling of your hands tracing under her shirt, the bare skin beneath prickling with goosebumps as you lead her to your bedroom. 

Your hands swiftly unbuttoned her shirt, pushing it over her shoulders, gasping while her teeth nibbled down the side of your neck. She only detached long enough to tug your shirt over your shoulders, fingers deftly undoing your bra, hands coming up to cup your tits, pinching at your nipples, bringing them to peaks. Your hands found their way to her waist, shoving the skirt down her legs, hands toying with the waistband of her panties, you could feel the smirk of her lips against yours while she tugged down your pants. You whimpered at the loss of her lips against yours, breath hitching when Casey dropped to her knees, fingers tickling the bare skin above your underwear, pulling them down, laying a trail of fiery kisses up your thighs. 

“Fuck sweetheart…” She murmured, laying a nip against your inner thigh, fingers toying with your wetness, dragging it out, loving the whines she was able to pull from you with barely any contact. 

Casey shot a glance up to you, head thrown back, hand already buried in her hair, smirking before she gave you pussy a slow but determined lick. You practically shuddered at the feeling, fingers digging against her scalp as she began to fuck you with her mouth. Her tongue plunged into you, slurping and groaning at the taste of you, her lips came to wrap around your clit, two fingers swiftly plunging into your wetness, you let out an unintelligible sound at that, collapsing down onto the bed behind you. You were panting, body vibrating beneath her, eyes scrunched shut, nothing but moans and whines escaping your lips, a string of swears following them. Your body could barely handle it, how on earth was Casey this fucking good with her mouth?! It was nearly moments later, your thighs shook, a scream loud enough to wake your neighbours broke through your lips. She could feel the pulsating of your walls around her fingers, not relenting her attack on your clit until you were a fucking mess beneath her. You slowly came back to earth while she crawled up into the bed, kissing you with such gentleness you could barely believe it was the same person.

“Good girl.” She muttered, making you chuckle.

“Oh you have no idea baby.” You were quick to flip her over, tongue plunging into her mouth, moaning at the taste of you on her lips. Your hand snuck beneath her panties, toying with her clit, rolling it between your fingers as she whimpered against you. Your free hand moved to the drawer the bedside table, pulling out the mini vibrator while your fingers moved into her cunt, slowly and purposefully plunging into her waiting and ready pussy. Casey’s hips thrust up, rutting against your body, unable to control herself, eyes screwed shut in passion, moans breaking free of her lips.

Your lips hit her lower ones gently, a gasp escaping her lips, your name moaned throughout the room. You relished the taste of her, groaning about how sweet she was, lapping up as much as you could from her gorgeous cunt, sucking at her lips, rolling her clit into your mouth. You loved the way she gasped when your mouth encased her clit, the airy breath and uncontrollable shivers telling you just how sensitive she was. It was then that you clicked on the small vibe, moving back to her folds to fuck her with your mouth while the vibrator hit her clit. She nearly shrieked out in pleasure, hips bucking against you, the yelps of your name echoing off the apartment walls. And when she came, it was harder than she’d ever come before, body shaking and vibrating against yours heavily, what she would realize later were sobs leaving her lips as she came down from the orgasm. 

Softly you kissed your way up her body, tossing the vibe to the side, snuggling her overheated body to yours. She willingly accepted that, chest still heaving while she curled around you, coming down from her orgasm. Her gentle arms wrapped around you while your hands traced patterns on her bare skin, tugging the blankets up around the two of you. You laid a gentle kiss against her hair, you felt her lips hit your collarbone in the same matter, snuggling deeper against each other, welcoming the feeling of someone sharing an intimate moment. It was about twenty minutes later when she pulled away from you, your brows furrowed as she fumbled through the room, starting to tug on her clothes,

“Case?”

“I’ve got an arraignment at 9…I should get home.” She leaned back over you, lips meeting yours feverishly, a grin on her face, “I’ll see you soon babe.” You smiled, hand cupping her cheek, quick to peck her lips again.

“Fine.” Her lips met yours again, a quiet laugh breaking free against your lips, “Let me know when you’re home.”

“Of course.” She gave you that oh so adorable over the shoulder smirk while she retreated from your bedroom. You collapsed against your bed, waiting for the sound of the door swinging shut before you moved to go lock it, the bliss of the evening hanging through the air, the smile still present on your lips.


	5. Chapter 5

The next few months passed with ease, work was smooth, a lot, and busy, but smooth. Melinda was able to move you through things with expertise you never would have imagined, as the weather got colder you ended up on more crime scenes, more late nights spent with the detectives and one hell of a lot more coffee. But you were happy, spending the hours doing what you’d worked so hard to achieve making you enjoy every moment of it, despite the looming darkness that came along with the job. 

As for your _situation_ with Casey, things seemed to be going smoothly, it was frequent you spent the evening together, buried in each others bodies, figuring out just exactly what made the other person tick, what made them gasp out into the room, what was the thing that truly made the other tremble beneath them, shaking against the bed. You still regularly saw each other at work, and met up for a variety of hangouts, from coffee to a brief lunch before one of you had to race off to work, or a full fledged dinner and drinks. Sometimes you simply buried into each other on one of your couches, deep into a Netflix or movie trilogy binge, the wine flowing freely while you half curled up with each other.

You did keep everything professional and private, especially in public, there may have been the rare kiss, or a hand on a thigh, a quick tug of the other’s hand, but to the untrained eye, you were simply a pair of friends out for a post work drink. Most of your time was spent in your apartment, you hated Casey’s habit of leaving, no matter how late it was, she always reminded you with a gentle kiss that she just didn’t sleep well in someone else’s bed. You’d never protest, knowing that it was usually a work night, she needed a proper head on her shoulders to deal with the case the next day. 

Currently, you were thrown against your bed, head tossed back in the pillows as your hands gripped the sheets so tightly your knuckles were white, whimpers leaving your lips while Casey tortured you with a rabbit vibe, her voice huskily chuckling as she watched the toy plunge in and out of you. Her fingers came to play with your clit while she pulled it out, moving up to pinch against your nipples, cupping your breasts, rolling them in her hands as her mouth came to suck one into it, groaning at the taste. You were a shaking mess beneath her, clutching at her body, eager to feel her skin against yours, you could feel the smirk splayed against your tit while your hips thrust up against the toy. Your moans begging for her to let you cum, begging for more, for more of her. She pulled the toy out of you, setting it against your clit, causing you to yelp while her free hand plunged into your sopping cunt, 

“Fuck baby you’re drenched..” She husked into your ear, egging you on even more, you practically sobbed against her lips when she finally met yours, tongue delving into your mouth, absorbing your moans against her mouth. She pumped her fingers furiously into you, twisting and tapping against your most sensitive spots while the vibe tormented your clit. You felt your walls pulsing around her fingers, hips thrusting against her, breaking free of the kiss, loud gasps leaving your lips, her name shouted from you as your legs fucking shook, coming harder than you ever had before.

Panting, you collapsed on the bed, eyes screwed shut, ever so thankful at the sound of the vibe being turned off, Casey’s chuckle echoing through the room. You felt her fingers trailing across your lips, opening your mouth instinctively, humming around them as you sucked your juices from them. 

“Good girl.” She lay a gentle kiss on your forehead as she dropped back onto the bed, letting you curl around her, your heart still pounding, her hands traced across your bare skin, scratching gently at your hair. You felt your eyelids flutter, completely blissed out by her actions, breath finally coming to an ease as you sighed against her skin. You were nearly asleep when you felt her frame gently shuffle from the bed into the darkness of the room.

“Casey..” You whined, barely opening your eyes, “C’mon…it’s Friday…” She leaned down, giving your head a soft kiss, stroking the side of your face, 

“That doesn’t mean neither of us has to work.” Her lips met your softly, “Hell it probably means there’s a higher chance for one of us to be called in.” You cracked an eye open, taking in her gently smile through the dark room, “I’ll text you once I’m home, sleep tight baby,” Her lips met your head once more before you were completely blissed out, falling into a world of sweet dreams before you could even imagine.


	6. Chapter 6

Your little charade continued to keep up over the next couple of months same as usual. You’d spend the weeks working in the lab or morgue, and Saturday nights tangled in Casey’s limbs, panting for air and begging for that sweet release. The two of you were waiting for your take out order one night at your favourite joint around the corner from your apartment. Casey was completely engrossed in her phone answering an email, the sun was bouncing perfectly off the East River, illuminating her in soft golden light and it made her absolutely fucking sparkle. You swiftly moved towards her, aiming for a gentle kiss on her cheek, a soft hand on her back when she quickly pulled away. She glanced up from her phone, taking in the confusion on your face.

“Just..not here.” She didn’t miss the hurt that flashed through your eyes, grabbing you hand and giving it a reassuring squeeze, a grin on her lips. “I’ll make it up to you when we get home, promise.”

“You sure everything’s okay?” You tried to hold back the wavering in your voice, not wanting Casey to get a real sense of how out of left field you’d found her statement.

“Hmm?”

“You’ve just been…distant recently?” She sighed heavily, looking up from her phone.

“Yeah baby, it’s just work. Sex crimes is a bit much sometimes.”

“Okay.” Mustering up the best smile you could, you were ever thankful when they called your name and you were able to make the hasty escape into the darkening streets. 

Casey barely noticed your overwhelming quietness that evening, attributing it to a long week at work, she knew you’d had more than a couple of overnights that turned into back to backs. She simply let you curl up against her after dinner was cleared, softly playing with your hair while you caught up on that week’s t.v. True to her word, she very much so did make it up to you, dragging you to the bed captured in a searing kiss, hitting every inch of your skin with her soft lips, bringing you to a point of delirium more times that you could even keep count of. Your body vibrating in after shocks, making her softly chuckle as she pulled you to her, encouraging you to wrap yourself around her body. She cooed praise against your hair, hand stroking the bare skin of your back. You felt your eyes fluttering shut, the exhaustion of the week taking over, the steady rhythm of Casey’s heartbeat lulling you into a gentle slumber.

Some amount of hours later you awoke with a shiver, reaching out in blind hope to the other side of the bed, a groan of a sigh breaking through the room. Of course she was gone, she always left, you’d just been holding onto a sliver of optimism that she might have actually stayed tonight, not wanting to brave the cold winter night air. Tugging the blankets tighter around you you snuggled back into the pillows, the faint scent of her shampoo wafting through the air.

***  
Melinda had sent you on a quick coffee run after you’d stifled out your 745th yawn of the evening, having been called back to work after barely making it down the block. You had to go a couple of extra blocks to the Starbucks instead of your usual joint due to the late hour, tugging your coat tighter around you while you waited at a red light on the return trip. 

Your gaze was drawn into the takeaway across the street to your left, the warmth of the light cutting into the darkened street. Harsher than the gust of wind blowing through the street was the sudden stabbing in your chest, you felt your whole body freeze, feet glued to the cold concrete under you. Inside the shop, with her arms wrapped around another woman was none other than Casey, a bright laugh on her face you could practically hear ringing in your ears. She lent in, kissing the woman passionately, hand curling around her neck, they stayed close sharing a series of smaller kisses, adoration pouring into each other. 

It was only when a car horn blared that you jolted back to earth, giving a wave of an apology to the driver before scurrying across the street, racing back to the M.E.’s office. It felt like you’d dropped a chunk of your heart on that corner, no wonder Casey had seemed so distant the last couple of weeks, she’d been screwing around with someone else. And with how fast your blood was pumping through your body, you suddenly knew exactly how you felt about her, there was no pretending anymore.

Fuck.

“Okay…” Melinda’s voice broke through your racing thoughts, “What the hell happened in the ten minutes it took you to get coffee? Cause you look like you’ve seen a ghost and there is a literal corpse in front of you right now.”

“Nothing. I’m just tired.” You shot back, not meeting her eye. She gave out a gentle sigh, placing the scalpel down before tossing the sheet over the body.

“What happened with Casey?” You mirrored her movements in stripping off your gloves, knowing that when Melinda wanted information, she was going to get it.

“Nothing. Why?”

“Oh honey…just because I work with dead people doesn’t mean I can’t feel your heartbreak from here. What happened?”

“You mean aside from being a fucking fool and letting myself _completely_ fall in love with her?”

“Considering we all knew that was going to happen six months ago, yeah, I do mean aside from that.” You couldn’t help the small cry that burst through your throat, eyes burning with tears that began to slip down your cheeks.

“I saw her with someone else…”

“Sweetheart, c’mere.” Melinda met you halfway around the table, pulling you into a warm hug, “You sure it wasn’t just a friend.”

“Friends don’t kiss each other in the middle of a Bodega like that.” You sniffled, embarrassed about the entire situation. You hadn’t realized just how deeply you’d managed to fall for Casey, how much something like this would sting. “She wouldn’t even let me kiss her cheek or hold her hand in public two weeks ago, she never spends the night, she’s been so hot and cold recently and whenever I try to talk to her about it she shoves me away.” Pausing briefly to wipe away at your tears you gently tugged away from Melinda, “God I’m such a fucking idiot. I thought we were moving into a relationship and it was really just about sex after all.” 

“I’m sorry honey.” She gave your shoulder a soothing rub, holding the box of tissues out for you. You mumbled a thanks, cleaning up your face, doing your best not to smudge your mascara any worse.

“Glad you’re still here, lab results.” O’Halloran stepped into the room, dropping a file onto the counter. “Hey, whoa, you okay?” You gave him a gentle nod, a muttered ‘yeah’, thankful that you had such a good relationship with your superiors.

“Novak…” Melinda muttered, “Was with someone else.” Ryan gave a sigh, squeezing at your arm, 

“Didn’t we say that was a bad idea?”

“No!” You retorted, “ _You_ said it was a bad idea, Melinda encouraged it.” She simply shrugged.

“When you’ve been married this long you’ve got to live vicariously through someone. Now, we’ve learnt the lesson, you move on, get over her.”

“And how exactly do you propose I go about that.”

“I’ve always said the best way to get over someone is to get under someone else.” You snorted, smacking Ryan in the chest at the comment.

“Just pick up a random off the street? Yeah, great idea.”

“Honey, have you been so buried in Casey’s…well…you know, that you’ve completely missed all of Amaro’s advances?” You cocked a brow at the other woman, 

“Amaro? Please…”

“Oh she is _not kidding_ , guy definitely has a thing for you.”

“Please…don’t indulge me in your locker room boy talk.” You grimaced, you’d sat through enough of beers with the boys to know how they could get. 

“Just say yes next time he asks you to join them for drinks, might be worthwhile?” Melinda pulled you into a half hug, giving a maternal kiss to your forehead, “Now get outta here.”

“You sure?”

“Yeah, I can take care of Mr Morasch myself. Pick up a bottle of wine, cry it out, then switch it up.” She shot you a wink that you gave a small smile to, thanking both of them for their ‘words of wisdom’. You were truthfully so thankful for the support, especially in the workplace. So you did exactly what Melinda said, well, technically you picked up two bottles of wine, throwing on the Bachelor marathon, crying until you didn’t have any tears left in you. You felt empty, yet somehow relieved and strangely calm about the whole thing a few hours later.

After all, how could you lose Casey if she was never yours to lose in the first place.


	7. Chapter 7

It had been at least a week since the night you’d spotted Casey, but despite your heartbreak you seemed completely unable to steer clear of her. Part of you was still her friend, joining her for post work drinks, especially when others were involved, your heart unable to say no when she needed you, unable to push her away when she asked if you needed a walk home. Even more unable to bring up the other woman, you just settled for second best, knowing that’s how it had always been, knowing that you’d simply have to settle in life, it was already what you were used to, why change things now? It’s not like she changed things, disappearing from your apartment regularly during the night. 

It was that Friday when you’d finally had enough, you’d spent half the autopsy complaining to Melinda about the situation, she’d obviously chastised you for continuing to sleep with Casey (despite her earlier encouragement, she was clearly on another ship by now). Thankfully you were at the point of anger, of frustration and you didn’t have to worry about any more tears spilling while you worked. It was when Amaro showed up, asking for specific reports on behalf of Olivia that she spoke up, a smirk evident on her face despite the mask covering her lips.

“Parker, you’re good, head out for tonight, it sounds like you need a drink.” You shot her a glance as she reassured you, moving into the change room while she talked with Amaro. You nearly jumped when you returned into the hallway, his voice ringing through the space.

“You wanna grab a drink?” It was this time that you didn’t miss the way his cheek dimpled when his lips curved up into a smile, the way his eyes softened in your direction.

“I..yeah..sounds great.” You gave him your most genuine smile, following him out of the M.E.’s office to his car. 

You ended up at Dive 75, you honestly weren’t too surprised, the bar had board games spread throughout he tables, a little extra way to break the ice, and considering Nick had two kids, it was basically his niche by now. You both picked over some wings and mozzarella sticks, you’d surprised him with your choice of an Amber City Ale to drink. You let out a genuine laugh as you beat him in another round of connect four,

“Oh _come on_ Nick, you can’t be this bad at this game, stop letting me win!” 

“I promise I’m not!” You smirked, giving his leg a shove under the table,

“Yeah, sure..” Shooting him a grin as the waitress approached, both of your drinks having been emptied. When she asked if you wanted refills you glanced across to Nick, a gleam in your eye, “I’m ah..I’m good.” He met your eyes with the same gleam.

“We’ll grab the bill.” He shot you a wink, “Together.”

“Nick!” You tried to protest, but he was quick to insist he would be paying, he had invited you out after all. You paused briefly on the sidewalk out front, thinking about what Warner had told you, not to mention the way you’d clicked with such ease that night. Nick however was quick to beat you to it, yet again.

“I had a great time tonight Y/N..” He started, closing in on you, you felt your cheeks burn at the admission,

“I did too..” It only took a second, your hands grasping as his belt, his softly cupping your cheeks, lips meeting each other oh so gently, moving with passion. You moaned at the feeling of his tongue delving into your mouth, a hand wrapping around your back, tugging you against his warm body while your arms wrapped around him, lost in the taste and feeling of him against you. You let out a gasp as his teeth sunk into your lower lip, tugging it away from your mouth, the spark evident in his eye even as he spoke.

“Sorry..”

“Don’t be…” You breathed, face flushing, “I..uh..I’m in Midtown, you okay to drop me off?” He smirked at that.

“Sweetheart, as long as you’re okay with it I won’t just be dropping you off.” You practically launched at him at that, tongue plunging into his mouth, lightly moaning against how he was more than welcome to just drive you home.

It didn’t take long for Nick’s car to park in the garage of your apartment, you doing your best to not let your nerves overcome you as you giggled your way through the elevator ride. Dropping your keys on the entrance table you kicked off your shoes, shouldering off your coat to the rack while Nick did the same. Turning to him gently, a brow quirked, 

“You…want a drink?”

“Did you?” He smirked back at you, already knowing the answer. You laughed in response, tugging him to you, if you were going to be that person, use him to get over someone else, why bother with the niceties. Your lips met in a crashing kiss that you immediately let him dominate, leading him backwards to your bedroom. Groaning at the taste of him against your tongue as you tugged his tie, eager to gain access to his bare frame. He was quick to slide his hands under your top, cupping and pinching at your tits, his hips thrusting against you at the moan it elicited.You were more than okay with him tossing your shirt and bra to the side, you nipped at his lip, smirking at him while you dropped to your knees.

Your hands made quick work of his belt, pulling his pants and briefs down, a vocal groan left your lips at the sight of his leaking cock. You gave his tip a soft kiss, humming at the salty taste of his pre cum before you sucked his length into your mouth. Nick let out a very audible groan, his hands shooting to dig into your hair, the feeling of your lips almost too much to bare for him. He did his best to be gentle as your mouth wrapped around his cock, the sounds nearly too much for him before you gave him a powerful suck, tugging off him.

“C’mon Nicky…fuck my face…” The look of surprise on his face caused you to chuckle, laying a long lick on the underside of his dick, your mouth staying wide open for him to take advantage of.

“Jesus Sweetheart..you sure?” All it took was a gentle nod and your lips closing around him before he began to thrust against you. Your nails dug into his thighs as you braced against him, the string of groans edging you on even worse than before. You wanted his fucking cock more than you’d ever imagined, feeling your panties dampening at the feeling of him hitting your throat. When he hit your gag reflex you pulled off, a sting of saliva connecting his cock to your mouth that he loudly swore at the sight of.

“Need you..” Was about all you could manage out before he grabbed you, tossing you against your bed, smirking at the way you giggled when your body bounced against the mattress. You thought he’d simply plunge into you, your hips thrusting up at the desire, surprised when his mouth met your cunt, a shake leaving your body. His mouth fucked you slowly, eager to repay you for your earlier actions. If you had ever throught about sleeping with Nick Amaro, you’d never thought he’d be this fucking talented with his mouth, lips wrapping around your lower ones, tongue plunging into you with ease, groaning at the taste of you, moaning for more. Your hands dug tightly into his hair, a string of swears leaving your lips, whimpers as your body shook against him, coming much quicker than you’d thought.

“You okay?” His voice was unbelievably soft as he pecked up your bare skin. Your head nodded, breath shaky as you grasped his cheek, pulling him into a deep kiss.

“Please…fuck me.” It only took a second before he smirked at you, you pulled a condom from your night table, passing it to him, he gave you a gentle kiss as he slid it on. His cock hit your clit, causing your to gasp, hips thrusting up against his body, “P..pleasee….” You begged out. He wan’t one to deny you, sinking into you heat, groaning at the feeling of you around him.

“Fuck baby…you feel so fuckin’ good.” You whimpered at the feeling of Nick plunging into you, cock dragging across your walls in ecstasy, “Fuck.” He stuttered, “Look at how good you’re taking my cock. Good girl.” The praise had your head thrown back against the pillows, hands scrambling against Nick’s body, in any attempt to tug him closer to you, body thriving against his.

“Nick..please…I’m gonna…” The words barely left your mouth before his fingers hit your clit, pinching and rolling at it, your hips thrusting against his even harder, whines leaving your mouth as you body shook against his, juices leaking over his thighs. His cock dragged against you a few more times before you felt him shudder, coming into the condom, his breath uneven and heavy as he disposed of it in the garbage. 

“C’mere.” You gave a gentle sigh, more than willing to let his arms wrap around you. 

“You okay?” You asked quietly, hand barely daring to touch his bare chest. It was almost as Nick could feel the hesitancy, grabbing your hand, pulling it around him while he shot you glance.

“Fuckin’ perfect.” He gave you a soft kiss, lips moving with ease against yours, free hand stroking against your hair. You felt like it only took a moment before you were lulled into a sleep against his body, surprised at the warmth he enveloped you in.

**

Letting out a brief sigh you rolled over, not surprised to find the bed empty. It’s not like people disappearing in the middle of the night was anything new, you didn’t know why you expected anything different at this point. You let out a groan of a huff, heading to the en suite, splashing your face with water, making sure to brush your teeth, you felt your body tense when you heard movement at the other end of your apartment. Figuring it must just be your imagination you hesitantly made it to the entrance, shocked to find Nick locking the door behind himself, a grin on his face.

“Hope it’s okay I borrowed your keys, you didn’t seem to have much for breakfast, or coffee.” Your brows scrunched, confused at the tray in his hand. He stopped, taking in the look on your face, pausing in conversation, 

“You…you’re still here?”

“Yeah..” He gave a soft laugh, testing the waters, “I…I can leave if you want me to.”

“No…” You spoke softy, unsure of what you actually wanted, “I…I’m just not used to people staying over…they usually vanish in the middle of the night.” He gave you that usual cheeky smile, pulling you closer to him, kissing your forehead, 

“I’ll leave if you want to, but I’m more than okay with staying.”

“I..yeah…that sounds great.” You gave him the best smile you could muster. You had to admit, the sex had been great, and you knew you needed to get over Casey, maybe O’Halloran and Melinda were right, maybe this was the way. You led him to your couch where you ended up spending the rest of the day laughing over t.v. and groaning over delicious takeout, snuggled up against each other until Olivia ended up calling him into work. Nick gave you a soft kiss, telling you he’d call you soon (though you highly doubted that) before taking off into the cold night.


	8. Chapter 8

“That was fucking delicious.” Casey practically moaned over the last bite of lunch, “Thank you for finally dragging me here.” You smiled, technically, she’d been the one to ask if you had time for lunch, but it was one of your favourite places in Manhattan to eat.

“I keep telling ya, you need to spend more lunches _out_ of the office.”

“You’ve got that right.” She gave you a warm smile as you checked your watch, 

“Speaking of…I’ve gotta get back.” Your lunch was brief enough that you hadn’t even managed to fully change out of your scrubs, bare in the tank top you wore underneath, Casey couldn’t help but smile at how adorable you looked in them, hair innocently pulled back in a French braid. You went to grab your wallet from your bag when Casey’s hand shook from across the table,

“Mmm. Don’t worry about it, I’ve got it.”

“You sure?” Your movement froze, brow quirked at her.

“Yeah. Besides, you got it last time.” You shot her a grin, thankful at the way you were able to handle things, there was never a ‘you owe me’ moment between you, you just seemed to have each others backs. 

“Thanks.” Sliding out of the booth you made your move to leave, “I’ll see ya soon.” Surprised when her hand grabbed yours, tugging you back towards the table, towards her.

“Come over tonight?” 

“I can’t…Melinda’s got me working overtime.” She gave an adorable pout that you couldn’t help but smile at, “Maybe Sunday? Think we’ve got a few episodes of This is Us to catch up on.”

“That we do.” If you were surprised when she pulled you back to the table, you were shocked when a grin split across her lips, her hand tugging you closer to her, the free one cupping your cheek softly as her lips met yours. You felt your breath hitch at the gentleness of the motion, hand resting against her bicep as your lips glided against each other, and in an instant you hated that you had to go back to work, wanting nothing more than to spend the rest of the afternoon buried in her arms. You nearly whined when your lips departed, cheeks flushed at the moment, “I’ll see you Sunday.” Casey gave you a quick peck, playfully swatting at you when your phone beeped again, reminding you to get back to work.

“Yeah…” You gave her a soft smile, quickly making your way out of the restaurant. Your brain was a whirlwind of emotion, lines scrambled, knotted against each other as you moved through the chilly city blocks. Truthfully it had been a bit since you’d spent a night with Casey sexually, you’d still had your meal dates and t.v. marathons but you’d actually managed to drag yourself away before she managed to drag you to the bedroom. 

Maybe, just maybe, she missed you as much as you missed her?

***

Saturday you’d been wrestled into meeting the lab crew at Taproom 307, it was one of the tech’s birthday’s and a celebration was in order that you couldn’t manage to make an excuse for. These guys didn’t drink often, and when they did, they went fucking hard, though you could easily keep up with them. Not to mention they always met up earlier, even on the weekends, you could at least be in bed at a reasonable hour. You’d been sipping slowly through your glasses of rose, but unable to turn down the multiple rounds of shots while you picked over the finger food spread across the table. You were up at the bar, discreetly sucking back a glass of water when your phone started ringing, answering it without checking the I.D.

“Parker?”

“ _I need you…_ ” The words came out shakily, your entire demeanour changing, suddenly more alert than you were a moment before.

“Case?” You questioned, heart beginning to pound against your chest.

“Y/N…please?”

“Where are you?”

“Home.” 

“I’ll be right there.” You were quick to settle your tab with the bartender, moving back to the table to grab your things, groaning at the sight of another FOUR rounds of shots on the table. You tried to shy away from them but Burt was hollering something about you needing to take them, it was a celebration after all, rolling your eyes at the man you shot all four back in a row like the rest of them. It was only when you grabbed your coat, mentioning that you had to leave when O’Halloran gave you a look as he returned to the table with a fresh beer.

“You leaving?”

“Yeah, I’ve gotta…thing…”

“Y/N… _don’t._ ” The look in his eye knowing _exactly_ where you were headed, his voice hushed to keep privacy from the rest of the team.

“Ryan, please!”

“She’s toxic and you know it.” You shot him a glare.

“She’s hurt!”

“More like she’s gonna hurt you again.” You shook your arm from his grip, a scowl on your face,

“Stop acting like you know what you’re talking about. I’m a big girl, I can handle myself.” Not giving him a chance to respond you quickly left the bar, hailing a cab, rattling off Casey’s address to the driver.

***

Casey was quick to tug you into her apartment, the door barely locked before her lips were on yours, groaning against the sweet taste of the wine remnants in your mouth. You could barely even try to get a word in, still curious as to what was going on when she offered you a large glass of scotch. Though it didn’t take long for you to quickly forget everything as she backed you into her bedroom, peeling off your clothes, hand cupping your heat. You’d managed to strip each other bare as she collapsed against her bed, your naked form on top of her, whimpers leaving each others lips as they moved against each other with ease. You pinched at her tits, smirking at how her body shot up against yours, hand trailing down to her pussy, fingers trailing through her folds,

“Fuck baby…” You murmured at the wetness you found, lips tracing down her neck while your fingers plunged into her. Casey gasped into the room, a hand scratching into your shoulder while the other found it’s way to your clit, rolling it in time with your fingers fucking her. 

You nipped against her pulse point, sucking against the supple skin, a soft groan as her fingers pressed harder against your nub, yours curling up to meet her g-spot. You increased the speed, thumb moving up to roll against her clit, her hips shooting up against your body, gasping moans repeatedly leaving her lips. You scissored your fingers, spreading open her dripping pussy, thumb pressing tightly against her bundle of nerves, right as she pinched yours. You could barely continue to move your fingers when she pressed her hand even harder against you, circling with immense pressure, you shook above her, teeth biting into her shoulder, orgasm overtaking you. 

Panting, eyes screwed shut you rolled your thumb harder, fingers continually curling against the spongey spot inside her, the breathy moans leaving her lips egging you on. You sucked a nipple into your mouth, gently rolling it between your teeth smirking as her body arched against you. You could feel her walls fluttering around you, knowing she was close you shifted your body lower, lips wrapping around her clit, causing her to gasp. You chuckled as her hips shot up, rolling against your mouth as your fingers thrusted into her repeatedly, walls of her cunt clenching around you as her moans grew volume. A hand shot to your hair, grasping at the roots, tugging heavily, nearly forcing your face deeper into her as the yelp broke from her lips, coming heavily around your hand. Gently you withdrew your fingers, kissing up her body, hands tracing soft patterns on her skin while she regained her breath, eyes still screwed shut. Dropping back against the bed you let your hand trail across her body, lips curled in a smile as you watched her come down from the bliss you’d brought her to, propped up on your elbow. It was after a few moments, when her breath finally returned to normal, eyes fluttering open that you spoke, 

“You okay?”

“Yeah…” She breathed, not moving her gaze from the ceiling. Alcohol still flowing through your veins you boldly shifted in at attempt to pull her into a kiss, her resistance of it landing your lips on her cheek.

“Case…?” Your soft voice broke through the room, liquor making you braver than you’d been before. She didn’t meet your eye, tugging the sheets up against her body.

“You should go.”

“What?” You felt your face furrow, sure you knew she wasn’t exactly the sleepover type, but to kick you out this quick wasn’t exactly her style.

“Y/N, you’re drunk.. go home.” You felt your heart drop into your stomach, quickly turning your back to her in any chance she might look at you, you didn’t want her to see the immediate tears burning in your eyes.

“I..uh..fine.” You managed to mutter, collecting your clothes faster than you realized you could tug them on. You’d swung the bedroom door shut behind you, tugging your sweater on as you made your way out to the entrance way. You noticed the scotch still sitting on the counter, chugging back what was left in your glass you glanced at the bottle. _Fuck it._ If Casey was going to fuck you over like this (again) it was the least you could do, grabbing an empty water bottle from your bag you poured a hefty amount of the liquor into it before slamming the door to her apartment.

You found yourself drawn to the only place where you felt solace, felt at peace, a place of utter quiet, where your mind was able to stop racing. That of course being the morgue of the M.E.’s office, which, honestly was probably a horrible idea considering you were swigging expensive (stolen) scotch from a plastic water bottle. But there was something so eerily calming about speaking out your problems to a room containing a cooler of dead bodies. 

You’d draped yourself over the examination table, legs hanging over the end, thanking the corpses for being so silent, occasionally swigging from the bottle of scotch, muttering something about how fucking stupid you were. You didn’t realize how long you’d been there, or that anyone would be bothering you until the door swung open, your head lolling towards the sound, your arm swinging up to take another sip of scotch.

“Jesus FUCKING Christ!” Melinda literally jumped back from the shock, “Y/N?!? I could’ve _sworn_ I left a corpse on that table.” She took a moment to recover, heart hammering in her chest.

“May as well we a corpse, I’m dead inside already.” Your words were starting to get slurred, she glanced to the bottle swinging in your hand, giving a sigh of exasperation.

“You were with her again, weren’t you?”

“No…” You vehemently denied, you managed one more swig before she grabbed the bottle from you, a whine leaving your lips. 

“You know I always know when you’re lying to me, right?” You turned to her, trying to hold back the tears in your eyes, hating how ashamed and stupid you felt.

“Nothing happened.”

“Sure. And what? You thought Jane Doe in there would be able to help you through it?”

“Unlike _some people_ Jane Doe doesn’t talk back.”

“Yeah well _unlike_ Miss Doe I can give you some actual advice so how about you cut the crap and tell me what happened.” Your hand made another swipe for the water bottle that Melinda was quick to pull away from you, a huff leaving her lips.

“Oh come on. Please.” She rolled her eyes, extending a hand to pull you up to sitting before allowing you a swig from the bottle. You took a minute, gathering your thoughts, “She kicked me out…” Melinda could feel the positivity in her chest squashed down to her toes at the tone of your voice, you’d been dealing with this bullshit for so long, but she’d never seen you this torn up about it. And to have Casey actually kick you out when you’d already been intoxicated wasn’t even responsible, reluctantly, she let you take another large swig of liquor from the bottle, nearly grimacing at the amount you took in. “Didn’t even wait ’til I was dressed…”

“Honey, she’s not worth it.” She gave your knee a soft squeeze, her eyes softly meeting yours, heart breaking at the glassy look of your own. It was only a moment later when there was half a knock on the door frame, you jumped at the sound, feeling even more of the affects of the liquor by that point.

“Hey, sorry. I…you weren’t answering your phone, I got worried.” It was Nick, you’d forgotten you’d invited him out to join the team at 307 earlier that week. 

“It’s dead..like everything else here.” You groaned, gesturing to the device plugged into the wall. 

“You okay?” He questioned, glancing between you, Melinda and the bottle of amber liquid in her hand.

“Mm’fine.” You mumbled, nearly stumbling from the table, moving to shove your phone into your bag, trying to hide your emotions from the room.

“Amaro do me a favour and get her home safe?” You felt Warner’s hand around your arm, guiding you towards the man, his hand settling at your lower back, making sure you were steady on your feet.

“Yeah, ‘course.”

**

Getting back to your apartment you unceremoniously kicked off your shoes, keys landing on the kitchen island while your coat found its home on the entrance way floor. You shuffled through the kitchen, hands grabbing the bottle of gin from the freezer right before Nick could stop you.

“Ohhhkay, we’re not gonna do that.” You grumbled as he tossed the bottle back into the freezer, opening the fridge to grab a bottle of water. “Let’s get you some water and outta these clothes.”

“Sure.” You mumbled, “All you want is to get me naked, just do it already.” You were shocked at the gentleness of his fingers cupping under your chin, bringing your watery eyes to meet his.

“Y/N, I would never. Besides, I’m a sex crimes cop, the last thing I’m going to do is take advantage of you when your drunk. C’mon, let’s get you to bed.” He wrapped an arm around you as he lead you down the hall, careful to guide you into the room, not missing the grumbling as you shed your clothes into comfier pyjamas. 

You nearly collapsed against the bed before he chuckled, pulling you to the en suite, sitting you on the basin. Nick dug through the drawers for a minute before he found the make up wipes, handing you the package, you mumbled a thanks to him, wiping the mask off your face as he delved into your medicine cabinet. You’d barely tossed the wipe in the trash when he had your toothbrush in front of your face, you grumbled, attempting to swat it away and hop off the counter.

“You’re worse than Zara, I’m not brushing your teeth for you, okay?” You shot him your best drunk death glare, accepting the brush into your hand as you moved in front of the basin, shoving him from the room while you finished, taking a quick pee break before you nearly stumbled back to your bed. You groaned against the comfort of the blankets, glancing up at Nick as he watched you, the emotions of the evening suddenly coursing through you like a hurricane.

“Nick…”

“Yeah?” He turned back to you, concern splayed across his features, 

“Stay…please…” Your voice shook, a sob taking over, unable to control it anymore, it had been such a rollercoaster of a night, you needed someone, some _thing_ to tell you that everything would be okay. Nick couldn’t help but soften at your words, knowing you were hurting, though not quite knowing why, you’d mumbled some half sentences to him after leaving the M.E.’s office, but he still wasn’t sure.

“Yeah, ‘course sweetheart.” He carefully stripped down to his boxers, softly moving into the bed next to you, gently pulling you against him, doing his best to comfort your crying form. He knew you were trying to hide it from you, keeping your eyes hidden from his, your sniffles barely audible, but the shakes of your body giving away your secret. It was only when your body finally eased with soft breaths that he let himself fall asleep, knowing you were finally okay, even if it was only temporarily. 

**

You awoke in the morning overheated despite the fact that it was the middle of winter and the heating in your apartment sucked, it was only when you shifted, feeling his arm around you that the events of the previous night slowly came back to you. Your movement caused him to stir, pulling your body closer to his big spoon, you let your eyes flutter shut, relishing in the intimacy you rarely got to experience for a while. 

It wasn’t much longer when you realized you were up for the day, your brain not letting your poor hungover self sleep any longer, and you desperately needed water. You gently and quietly shifted from your bed, tugging a fuzzy cardigan over your form, quietly shutting the door. Once in the kitchen you sipped back a bottle of gatorade, popping a couple of Advil while you jumped on Uber Eats on your phone. You were halfway through your McGriddle, having to pause, head in your folded arms against the kitchen island when you heard the bedroom door open.

“You hurtin’ today?” Nick half teased, taking in your crumpled form. You threw him a glare that was wrought with emotion.

“And to think I was nice enough to get you a McMuffin.” Tossing the bag at him you dropped your head back into your arms, not wanting to deal with the tears again.

“Thanks.” He pulled the sandwich out of the bag, tacking a large bite out of it, finishing chewing before he spoke again. “Who is she?” Your brows scrunched as you turned your face towards him, wincing at the movement.

“What?”

“On the way home last night, you said something about how she doesn’t love you.” Your face paled, eyes going wide, as if this hangover could get any worse.

“I..uh…no one….”

“Y/N, please, there’s no way you were as upset last night over no one. You’re clearly in love with her.” You raised your head from your arms, running your face through your hands and hair, trying to piece together your thoughts, stomach doing flip flops, and not from the hangover this time.

“I..fuck…” You dropped your head back into your arms, head facing the counter, surprised at the feeling of Nick’s hand on your back.

“Talk to me.” You let out a deep huff, shoving yourself up to look at him, eyes watery with tears.

“Casey…” You admitted, “We went to college together…things didn’t start up again ’til she took over A.D.A. Please don’t tell anyone.”

“I won’t.” He gave you a soft smile, 

“Nick, I’m so sorry.”

“For what?” His brows scrunched, perplexity taking over his face as you let out a sigh.

“I…I think Casey was using me, to..like, get over someone else, and it _destroyed_ me. And instead of being an adult, I..I kinda used you to _try_ to get over her..” He laughed softly at that, 

“Doesn’t seem like it worked.” 

“Wow!” The back of your hand gave his chest a soft thwack, a smirk evident on both your lips.

“I’m not offended.” He enunciated the point with a quick kiss to the side of your head, “I get it, the whole get with someone new to try to get over someone else….” He trailed off, a soft look in his eyes you barely recognized.

“Did it help you?” 

“What?”

“Did it help you get over Maria? He gave you a soft smile, 

“It’s a work in progress.” He stole a swig from your water bottle, “I’m always here if you wanna talk, you know that, right?”

“Since when did you become someone willing to talk about their feelings?” You shot back.

“I’m talking about _your_ feelings, not mine sweetheart.” You couldn’t help but roll your eyes at that, “I’m serious. Whether you need me to be your crying pillow or you need me to fuck you ’til you forget her, I’m down.”

“You’re really okay with this? I feel bad basically using you.” Nick let out a laugh over the sandwich, 

“Please, with your blowjob skills you should never have to apologize to a man ever again.” You let out a laugh, a full hearted laugh like you hadn’t in months at his response.

“Thank you?!” You nearly choked over the sip of water right as Nick’s phone went off.

“Aw fuck. I’ve gotta go.” He gently kissed the side of your head, “But I mean it, if a work in progress to forget other people is what this is, I’m okay with that.” He gave you a soft smile, “As a friend, I just want you to be happy.”

“Thanks Nick…” You gave his hand a squeeze before he disappeared from your apartment. Thankful for the day off that meant you could kill the rest of your stupid hangover buried in your couch with stupid reality t.v.


	9. Chapter 9

“Ya know, you seem oddly peppy today.” Fin’s brows furrowed at the man across the conference room table from him. Nick gave a little laugh, smirk evident on his lips as he glanced up at the older man, they’d been assigned to dig through some old case files, the only two in the room.

“Had a good weekend, s’all.” He’d literally spent the entire time at your apartment, most of it in the bedroom, to say the both of you had very high stamina would be an understatement. 

There were multiple moments where you were barely a level above horny teenagers, movie forgotten on the t.v. while you made out on the couch, grinding against each other, whimpers leaving your lips. On more than one occasion you’d simply gotten bored, having seen an episode already, starting to palm him through his pants, quickly sinking down to your knees, groaning at the taste of his cock on your tongue. In turn he’d gotten handsy when a a sex scene took over the screen, bringing you to a climax with just his fingers, chuckling at the whimpering as you came before he tossed you over his shoulder, carrying you to the bedroom.

“Yeah? What’s her name?” 

“You know I can’t tell you that.” Nick laughed openly, 

“If she’s got ya this smiley, she’s gotta be good at what she does.” Nick shot him a look, “Hey, it’s not like I’m gettin’ any, need to live vicariously through someone.”

“She’s…somethin’ else that’s for sure.” Amaro started, “I mean…when was the last time you got more than one blowjob in a day?”

“Before I stupidly got married, that’s for sure.” Fin laughed out.

“And I’m talking like, an epic blow job.” He gave a small laugh, appreciating the ability to share the information with someone, being able to brag about you without Fin knowing it was you, “Fuck is she ever incredible. Like, you remember the first time you ever got one, and it was the greatest fucking feeling in the world? It’s like that… _every time._ ”

“You’re a lucky man Amaro.”

“Oh I know it. Best part is she actually loves it, a girl that _really_ likes sucking dick? I mean she was legitimately begging me to fuck her face.” Nick jumped at the sound of a third voice joining into their conversation,

“Last time I checked I was here about sex crimes, not your overshared sex life Amaro.” Casey’s voice rang through the conference room, “You got enough for a warrant yet or not?”

“I..yeah Counsellor…” Nick stumbled slightly, pulling the file off the table, handing it to Novak quickly.

“Thanks.” She flipped through it, satisfied with the evidence, “I’ll get the warrants. And…keep your personal lives away from me, I really don’t need to hear about you getting your dick sucked, ever again.” She was gone literally as fast as she’d appeared, Fin nearly howling in laughter at Amaro’s reaction. He was up for some bro talk, but having Casey over hear it wasn’t exactly what he’d hoped for. Especially considering your history with her.

***  
“Oh _fuck!”_ You buried your head into his shoulder, “Nicky, we _really_ shouldn’t be doing this!” He chuckled against the soft skin of your neck, fingers plunging deep into your wetness while his thumb pressed against your clit.

“Awe, but sweetheart the risk makes it more fun, doesn’t it?” You missed the smirk he gave you, your teeth clenching down around the fabric covering his shoulder in an attempt to keep somewhat quiet. 

It was your day off, but you’d been dragged out by the fact that it was someone’s birthday, and the fact that you’d been practically hiding at home recently. It was a mixture of the squad and the lab team, enough people involved that no one would realize you and Nick were missing. The weather had finally began to really warm up, and he could barely help himself when you showed up in an adorable sundress, your usually tied back hair loose around your shoulders. The little curve of your thigh exposed, the swell of your chest heaving with laughter at someone’s ridiculous joke, he’d practically tackled you on your way back from the bathroom, pulling you into a storeroom where he promptly locked the door, laying a bruising kiss against your lips. Your panting increased, he could feel your walls flittering around his fingers, the way your hands clenched against his back, pulling him tighter to you, hips thrusting in rhythm with his hand.

“Be a good girl…I know you wanna cum for me.” The praise sent you over the edge, the muffled moan escaping against his covered skin, body shaking against his, you could feel your clit pulsing, eager for even more as your breathing calmed.

“Jesus Christ Nick.” You muttered, a soft laugh escaping your lips as you looked up at him, groaning in arousal as he sucked the taste of you off his fingers.

“You wanna get out of here?” He quirked a brow before you pulled him into a quick kiss.

“Like you wouldn’t fucking believe.”

**

It didn’t take long for you and Amaro to discreetly slip out of the bar unnoticed, it was still early enough you could play off excuses of work, previous plans, anything that they’d believe. Much like any other night, he’d barely gotten you through the doorframe, kicking it shut behind him before you literally jumped on him. Your lips met his feverishly, tongue plunging into his mouth, tasting the beer against his tongue while yours lapped at the taste of him. His hands tugged against your hair, against your skin, tugging the dress over your shoulders before his lips making their way down your neck. You gasped as they hit your pleasure point, a loud moan when his teeth sunk into it, tongue trailing over the bitten skin.

“Nicky please…” You begged, voice airy with want, attempting to pull him to the bed despite the fact that you were still wrapped around his standing form.

“Oh sweetheart I’m gonna let you come, don’t worry.” He smirked for a hot second, letting you drop onto the bed, “Get naked for me.” The forward statement came along with him quickly stripping of his own clothes, dropping them to your bedroom floor as you practically tore off your underwear. He couldn’t help the smirk when you groaned at the sight of his hard cock, moving towards it, “Uh-ah, tonights about you…promise.” 

You barely had a second to react, a giggle escaping your lips as he flipped you on the bed, your head landing among the pillows, a loud gasp escaping your lips as his mouth enveloped your cunt. A hand shot to the sheets, clenching at it while your hips jolted up against Nick’s mouth as he praised how fucking delicious you were, the other hand burying into his hair, unable to want anything but pressing him more into it. A shout left your lips as you felt his fingers plunging into you once again, nearly whimpering at the contact. They curled perfectly, hitting your g-spot right as he gave your clit a heavy suck, teeth nipping around it in the best way they could. Your body shook, a wail leaving your mouth, your juices shooting out of you harder than they ever had, breath panting heavily while Nick crawled up your body.

“Never seen you do that before…” He smirked.

“Never done that before.” You shot back, a grin splayed on your face, pulling him into a deep kiss, your voice airy and needing when you spoke again, “Fuck me hard…please Nick…”

He nearly came at the innocent look in your eyes alone, a deep groan leaving his lips when you flipped over, presenting yourself on your hands and knees, he swore heavily when you tossed your hair over your shoulder, looking back at him “Make me squirt again…” The only time he wasted was tearing the condom open before he plunged into you, swearing at the feeling of your sopping cunt wrapped around him. Barely able to stand the feeling of him dragging against your walls you dropped against the bed, a string of moans and swears leaving your lips. This was by far the loudest sex the two of you had had, noises of skin on skin vibrating off the walls, both of you not afraid to be vocal, the feelings too much, loud moans and yelps leaving your lips. Nick stuttered when his hips met yours in a particularly rough thrust, sending you flying towards the headboard, an elaborate moan of _‘Oh fuck Nicky..’_ leaving your mouth. His hand wrapped around your hair, pulling your body flush to him, 

“What..you like it rough baby?” 

“Yes..please..fuck..please…” You were so fucking close, you were so fucking weak you didn’t even care about absolutely begging for it. A gasp left your lips as Nick’s hand crept up your collar bone, sitting at the bottom of your neck for confirmation.

“This okay?”

“Please!” You nearly sobbed, the feeling of his cock dragging against you nearly too much. You thew your head back while his hand closed around your neck, the sensation throwing you way over the edge, body thriving against his. You barely remembered him chasing his own release, just the feeling of him spilling inside the condom, collapsing over you, swearing in satisfaction before he rolled over, disposing of the condom. You laid in silence for longer than a while, catching your breath, coming back to earth before Nick spoke, hand stroking your body softly.

“You okay?”

“Fucking perfect.” You murmured against the pillow before flipping to face him, snuggling against his body, “Though I’m fucking starving.” He laughed at that, kissing your forehead while he reached for his phone.

“What’d’you feel like?”

“Hmmm…” You pondered for a moment, “Could really go for some Pad Thai.”

“Chicken or tofu?” He replied, already knowing your two go to’s.

“Tofu please.” You kissed his bare chest softly, thankful for a ….friend who was able to actually understand you.

**  
It didn’t take long for a knock on your door after Nick had ordered the food, you were honestly surprised at how fast they were that night. He’d throw on his boxers, grabbing his wallet while you tugged on his button up, your dress still on the hallway floor. You simply hoped neither of you were too much of a mess for the poor delivery guy, padding your way down the hallway as Nick opened the door. 

“$25, right?” He asked, head down as he opened his wallet, tugging out the cash.

“What the _fuck!?_ ” You jumped at the sound of Casey’s voice, having finally made it in plain view of the doorway, “Y/N you can’t be serious….” She shocked by the sight of Amaro in boxers answering your door, begging that he was simply taking over your guest room for the week, but the sight of you clad in only his dress shirt was more than enough to confirm just exactly what was going on here.

“Casey?! What are you evening doing here?” You shot back, barely able to help the tears slowly leaking their way into your eyes.

“What am I doing here? Check your missed calls! I was worried! I _needed you_!” 

“Oh please!” You shot back quickly, honestly angered at the entire situation, if Casey was going to treat you like crap you could at least finally stand up for yourself. “You only care about me when it’s convenient to you. You don’t give a shit and I’m more than well aware.”

“So what?! You decide to go off and fuck Nick to distract you?”

“As if you don’t do the exact same thing!?” Your voices were raised, you were thankful Nick managed to keep out of it, not interjecting into the quick argument, “Get the FUCK out of my apartment!”

“So what?! So you can go back to sucking his dick!?” She shot back. You felt the anger and bit of alcohol swirling in you from earlier, words you never thought would leave your mouth slipping through your lips.

“You can stay all you want. But I’ll let him rail me in front of you, then maybe you’ll finally know what a real orgasm looks like!” Nick literally had to hold back the laughter at that one, he knew you’d always been a feisty one, but that, that had some goddamn pain to it, there was no doubt you were a fighter 

“You disgust me.” It was the last thing Casey managed to get out, you slamming the door unbelievably hard in her face, an angry yell leaving your mouth as you collapsed against it, barely able to meet Nick’s eyes.

“I understand if you want to leave…” You murmured, surprised when he moved closer to you, cupping your cheek in his hand.

“Our food’s still on the way, I’m not going anywhere.” 

“Nick, I’m sorry. I feel like an idiot.”

“Don’t…” His lips met yours, moving with ease, “You’re not an idiot. A fool in love maybe…but not an idiot.” You could barely focus at the way his mouth was nipping down your neck.

“Nicky…”

“Yes sweetheart?” He quirked, 

“Fuck me like you hate me?”

“Baby I’ll fuck you so hard you won’t even remember your own name, much less hers.”

“Please…” You breathed, honestly annoyed when the actual food arrived at your door, but thankful for the fuel because you definitely needed it.


	10. Chapter 10

You heard the voices coming from the exam room attached to Melinda’s office, where you were currently finishing up some paperwork as your last task of the day, having already changed out of your scrubs, shaking your hair out of your migraine inducing up do. Signing the lab report with one hand the other reached into the outbox, holding up the folder to Casey without saying a thing when she walked into the room.

“What? Don’t even get a hello?” She joked, taking the file. You sighed, dating the report and tossing it into the outbox,

“Well I figured since you find me _disgusting_ you’d prefer to keep the interaction brief.” Her face fell at that, ashamed at the way she’d handled that entire situation.

“I-uh…I’m sorry..about..that. I just didn’t expect you to ever sleep with Amaro.”

“Yeah well I was just trying to fuck away the pain.” You mumbled, back turned to her as you started to gather your things. 

“What are you talking about?” The concern was etched through her voice, and honestly, you’d had enough by this point, why bother to keep trying anymore if she was just going to constantly screw you over.

“You know, I don’t get it. I really don’t understand why you’re like this Casey, it’s fucking ridiculous!”

“Like what?” 

“You’re constantly claiming that you need me! If you need me so much why are you off sleeping with all these other women? Why waste my time when you had Tara, only to come crying to me when she broke up with you?”

“You don’t even know why she broke up with me!”

“Yeah, ‘cause you bury yourself in work.”

“She broke up with me because I said your name in bed.” You faltered, half of you wanting to believe her, half of you knowing exactly what kind of trap she was laying for you.

“Oh please! Cut the CRAP Casey! You wouldn’t even hold my hand but you were too busy making out with some other woman in the middle of the street to even realize I walked right past you!”

“I—“

“No!! You’ve spent the last year and a half leading me on, making it seem like you want to spend time with me but shutting me out the second I try to show any amount of emotion.” You moved towards the door, trying to hide the burning tears in your eyes from her. It hurt like hell to fight with her like this, but you had to rip the band aid off, it was time. “Go find one of your other girls to whine to. I’m gonna be late to meet Nick, who, by the way I’m only fucking to try and get over you.”

“Did it ever occur to you that I was sleeping with those women to try to forget the fact that I was in love with you?!!” That certainly caught your attention, you turned back to her just in time to see her wipe away the tear that’d escaped her watery eyes.

“You don’t get to do this now.” You could barely contain the shake in your voice, the anger burning through your words. Turning your back on her you made to leave the room right as Melinda burst in.

“Jesus fucking christ!”

“Sorry Melinda. I was just leaving.”

“Like _hell_ you are.” She grabbed at your wrist, tugging you back into the room to face Casey and to face your problems. “Are you seriously telling me that you two _idiots_ have been in love with each other this _entire_ time and you’ve just been to chicken shit to say anything!?” 

“What?” Casey’s voice was barely above a whisper, a look of shock on her face, eyes searching for yours. “You love me?” She felt her heart cracking, mind racing through all the time you’d spent together, the nights she’d laid awake wishing you were in her arms. You didn’t even realize you’d clenched onto Melinda’s hand, like a preschooler nervous and scared to set foot in a school for the first time. 

“I don’t know how you got that Ivy league education, ‘cause you’re pretty fucking dumb sometimes.” The words came out shaky, emotions wrought through your voice, not sure whether you wanted to burst into tears of anger, heartbreak or happiness, conflicted over everything. “I..I’ve kind of always loved you, but…when you moved back here, that’s when I knew, I knew it was more than some stupid crush…and every..every time—“ You took a shaky breath, dropping Melinda’s hand to wipe away at the tears you were unable to hold back anymore, “Every time I tried to show you, every time I tried to get a read on how you felt…you’d shove me away, shut me out. A little piece of me broke every single time.”

“I’m sorry….God I’m so sorry.” Casey truly felt horrible, she’d been so blinded she missed all the signs, “I…I had no idea. I didn’t know you wanted more, I had no idea you felt like that. I was just trying to protect myself, trying to keep myself from falling completely in love with my best friend.” 

“Did it work?” You finally met her eye, heart racing in your chest.

“Not in the slightest.” The faintest of smiles turned the corner of her lips up, a small cry escaped your mouth.

“You love me?”

“Every time I said I need you what I wanted to say was I love you.”

“Oh Casey…” You couldn’t hold back anymore, practically launching into her arms, wrapping tightly around her, the tears spilling from your eyes being built on joy this time. She cupped you to her, hand cradling through your hair, lips softly meeting your head. “I love you too.”

“I’m so, so sorry that I hurt you baby.”

“Idiots…” Melinda muttered, rolling her eyes before returning to the exam room, giving you a moment of privacy.

“Will…will you come over tonight?” You pulled away, eyes searching her for hesitancy, “We can sort this out?”

“Of course.” A smile on her lips, her hand cupped your cheek, bringing your lips to hers. The kiss was gentle, slow, and completely different than any other kiss you’d shared in the past, you could feel the emotion, feel the love finally able to flow freely between you. She linked her hand in yours as you left through the exam room, waving a quick good night to Melinda.

“Casey!” She called out, causing the two of you to stop in the doorway, “I don’t want her showing up here drunk and crying later tonight, you understand me? I know more than enough about dead bodies to make it look like suicide.”

“Melinda!!”

“Oh trust me, you won’t be seeing her again tonight.” Casey retorted, grin on her face as she kissed your cheek, murmuring something about how much she was going to make it up to you that night as you left the building.


	11. Chapter 11

Roughly a month had passed since the day you and Casey had finally revealed your true feelings to each other, you’d spent the night pouring over a your emotions and a bottle of wine. Casey’d apologized over and over again, feeling completely terrible for the mistaken way she’d been treating you, and again for the way she’d reacted to the whole Nick thing. You accepted them, forgiving her, knowing that she was jealous, trying to come to terms with the fact that you were with someone that wasn’t her, deal with her own breaking heart. 

By the time the wine was gone, you’d figured out how to move forward, you already had so much history, you felt like you were already nearly a year into a relationship, but there were obviously some hesitancies, some kinks that needed working out. You personally, were still unsure about the entire thing, half of you expecting Casey to vanish out of nowhere, to disappear as soon as you fell asleep, to pop up with another woman in her arms. You agreed to keep things mainly private at first as you unscrambled the wires, and you immediately decided to keep things exclusive, and most importantly you decided to keep the communication open and flowing easily. You’d known each other for years, you’d loved each other nearly as long, but there were still some walls to knock down. That night when you retreated to your bed you simply curled against each other, snuggling deeper into each others arms than you thought was possible, and Casey? Casey was more than happy to stay tangled in your arms all night, giving you the softest most pure good morning kiss that she could.

A few days later you were promptly shipped off to Brooklyn by Melinda, they were very short on staff and very overrun with cases, needing the extra hands that Manhattan didn’t. You didn’t see your usual squad, just the heart warming view of Casey inside your apartment when you came home at the end of the day. It was three weeks of Brooklyn before you had to take off to D.C. for another week at a medical conference, spending the time trapped in hotel rooms while you blatantly ignored the bantering of who was smarter than who based on how many times they were board certified.

You returned to New York just in time for Sonny’s birthday, the squad and lab team meeting up for celebration drinks that night. You’d had enough time to drop your stuff off at home and shower before heading out to the pub, telling Casey you’d meet her there as soon as she was done work. You were more than excited and relieved to be back in your regular borough, with your regular team. You were up at the bar getting your first drink, waiting for Casey when you got a rather large surprise in the form of Nick joining you, his hand entangled in someone else’s.

“Y/N! Hey!” She pulled you into a quick hug.

“Maria?!” You returned the hug, feeling your heart jump in your chest, “I didn’t realize you’d..be here..”

“We’ll have to catch up!” She turned to Nick, “Glass of red?” Quickly kissing his cheek she ran off to the bathroom. You turned to Nick, brow cocked.

“So…she doesn’t know…?” You gestured slightly between the two of you.

“No.” He took a swig of beer, “She thinks you’re a lesbian.”

“Thank fuck.” You muttered, he laughed, giving you a quizzical look.

“What?”

“I may be like low key terrified of her. She could snap my neck in seconds…” He let out a hearty laugh at that.

“Hey, sorry to dump that on ya like this. I would’ve told you sooner but things kinda happened so fast, where’ve you been anyways?”

“Brooklyn, D.C. It’s been a month.” You gave him a gentle smile, “And don’t worry about it, things…have a way of working out.” Your eyes moved up at the sound of the door opening, smile breaking across your face as Casey made her way to you.

“Hey.” She greeted softly, surprising both you and Nick as she pulled you into a deep kiss, smile evident against both of your lips. You weren’t sure if she was putting on a bit of an extra show to shove it to Amaro or if she really just missed you that much (to be honest it was both, and she had missed the feeling of your lips more than she could ever have imagined). Nick simply smirked, 

“Glad to see you two worked things out.” You laughed, passing a drink to Casey as she linked your free hand in yours while you made your way to join the rest of the squad. 

The night passed smoothly and quickly, there wasn’t an eye batted at the PDA shown between you and Casey, and you were beyond thrilled. You spent the night not leaving each others sides, hands linked, fingers trailing through hair, little stolen kisses in quiet moments. You stifled back a small yawn, the long hours of the week and the added travelling finally getting to you. Casey kissed your cheek gently, asking if you wanted to go, and you quickly made your good byes, leaving the bar hand in hand, your head gently leaning against her shoulder in the uber. You tossed your keys onto the entrance way table, kicking off your shoes when you returned to your apartment, Casey following suit before giving your arm a squeeze.

“How tired are you?” She quirked a brow, you gave a soft giggle, knowing exactly why she was asking, tugging her to you in a gentle kiss.

“Not that tired.”

“Good.” She kissed you again, “Cause I wanna show you just how much I missed you, just how much I love you.”

“Mmm…do you now?” You smirked against her, lips meeting hers with more passion this time as you dragged her towards the bedroom. Casey slowly tugged off your clothing, the power dynamic quickly shifting to remind you that she was the one in charge tonight. 

You nearly whimpered at the way her lips trailed across your jawline, down your neck, teeth nipping into your pulse point, sucking gently at it as she let your bra topple to the floor. Hands traced up your body that you shivered at before they cupped at your tits, rolling your nipples between delicate fingers, bringing them to peaks, bringing gasps from your lips. You collapsed against the bed under her frame, giggling lightly against her lips while she kissed you again, you tugged at her clothes, begging to feel her skin against yours. She was quick to comply, letting out a sigh of satisfaction as your hands tickled against her bare skin. Casey’s hand trailed between your thighs, relishing in the sound of your breath hitching when she hit your lower folds, toying with them, rolling your clit gently between her fingers. You let out a loud gasp when she unexpectedly sunk two into you, slowly pumping in and you, curling them every second thrust. You whined, pulling her mouth back to yours, lips whispering a hushed ‘I love you’ against hers, eyes pouring with adoration into hers as she watched you come undone, whimpering and shuddering beneath her. You came quicker than she’d imagined, clearly you’d obeyed her, not touching yourself while you were away. She softly pulled her fingers from your drenched pussy, kissing you deeply.

“I love you.” She murmured against your lips before hers left a pattern down your body, her teeth nibbling against your inner thighs. 

You barely had a moment to recover before her tongue swept through your cunt, nearly yelping as it flicked against your clit, a moan of her name leaving your mouth. You felt her arms wrap around your thighs as your head tossed back against the pillows, the feeling of her mouth against you nearly too much to handle. With expertise she sucked against you, pulling you into her mouth, sucking and licking against you, groaning at your sweet taste. Her tongue sunk into you, pulling out more of your juices, drinking in as much of them as she could. She ate you out like a woman starved, like someone devouring their last meal, like someone who could never get enough. Which, truly, she couldn’t ,Casey absolutely loved you, and absolutely loved the taste of you, her head buried between your legs was her favourite place to be, and it always would be. Softly she sunk a finger into your dripping wetness, lips moving up to suck your clit into her mouth, causing a yell to leave your mouth, the pleasure vibrating through your body. You only lasted a few minutes longer, her fingers tapping against your g-spot while her tongue lapped heavily at your clit, your body shaking against her, a muffled scream leaving your lips. Your breaths came out in pants, eyes still screwed shut as she softly stroked at your body, pulling you towards her, encouraging you to curl around her body. Casey kissed your forehead softly, letting her lips settle there for a moment before settling against the pillows a hand toying with your hair while the other tugged the blankets up around the two of you.

“You okay?” Her voice was quiet, barely breaking the silence of the room, you nodded against her skin.

“Mmhmm.” You kissed her chest gently, “I love you.” You murmured, “And I’ll always need you.”

“I love you too.” She tugged you tighter to her body, urging you into a gentle sleep. “I’ll need you forever.”

Three words.

Eight letters.

That was all it took for you to fall completely in love with your best friend, and now, you were finally able to spend the rest of your lives wrapped in each others arms.


End file.
